Alarm first goes off. Oh man. That irritating buzzz. Jeez, my head is hurting. Just five minutes more…..back to the snoring. Swirling colors, then a welcoming darkness……bzzzzzzzzzzz!
Stupid alarm! Fingers, do the job and teach that tyrant a lesson. Reach…open eyes now……reach…buzzzzzzzzzzz…some fuzzy numbers……process them…send to memory……..AHHHHHHHHhh! 7:30! Screwed completely. Rub the eyes….legs, do the thing…..brain get the senses alerted. Lunch packing….tell mom only apples…..bio homework sitting on desk……..jeans missing from cupboard…..tell mom to pack Gatorade………bio homework sitting on desk………brush teeth nicely……….polo shirt in second cupboard…….bio homework incomplete….HAVE to FINISH…..bio homework sitting on desk…..mom was ziplocing oranges…..tell her only apples……it’s 7:45…..the bus was leaving in 5 min……..bio homework incomplete……..only the red shirt goes with this pair of jeans and looks classy…….by the way, yesterday there was those girls who had made fun of Robert for his dark clothes in math class……..oh no……math project due Friday and takes two hours because Jeannie told Hallie who was told by Sam. Sam was very rude yesterday…….clock is ticking…..two minutes till the bus came……mom is hugging….tell her you love her……oh no….bio homework still sitting on desk……..legs run up, lungs breathe harder…..run run run…..catch the bus……three girls smiling at you……..smile back………bio homework incomplete…….imagine sitting in detention room………make haste in getting the pencil and fill it up…….mom packed apples for lunch……..red shirt………Sam was still upset……………..deep breath………………………
My dear readers, all of life you are all used to reading works of other humans. Literary analyses, books, novels, research papers, periodicals, etc. Now welcome to my story. I am no human……well, technically not..….and unlike you, I hardly write in complete sentences or follow grammatical rules. I just think and speak, or in this case, write. In fact, what I am writing right now was actually very hard and it took days for me to formulate this article. Because it’s so clear, concise to the point, making it easy for humans to follow.
So essentially, who am I? Essays and articles are inanimate; once you read, you are done. But I am real…….I am seeing you as you read this. And then I’m the voice in your head telling you “this article is crazy.” I know. Creepy.
So who am I? I could be your friend, but I could also be your enemy. Keep reading…..and if you can, see if you can unveil me. Realize that the speed of light has a stronger opponent. Me.
We’ll start with a simple example. Take the word blue. By just reading that word, what is your immediate thought? For some it might be “Oh…that’s my favorite color!” Or “I hate blue.” And perhaps it may trigger a memory of your favorite blue dress. And then an event for which you wore that favorite dress. And then the friends you had fun with at that event. Or you might think of the big, vast ocean. And imagine the waves. And perhaps sharks. And then probably JAWS. Then you might delve into your nightmares and remember that ghost story. And from ghosts, maybe you’ll transition to Azula and her blue lightning from Avatar:The Last Airbender.
One word. But infinite jumps. Some realistic, some imaginary, some crazy. One word. Random journeys across. That’s what I do to you. Or rather, that’s how I make you YOU.
So when it comes to school, and you’re told to write one paragraph and stick to one topic, you are flowing against your natural current. Because one word is a public key to many other thoughts and ideas and feelings. Routing those thoughts through one channel is therefore difficult to many, and sometimes it’s important for everyone to reflect upon how much they process every minute. Because what we speak or write is the result of thousands of neutrons and memory signals processed. Because I, the mind, am a library of interconnected thoughts of you.
Sometimes there are days. You feel like crying our heads out. Moments you can’t just accept. Worries you can’t express in sentences. But you just feel something….because of me. Yes, sometimes I can become your enemy. YOU might forget and accept, but I keep replaying memories back and forth. One friend might have hurt your feelings some seven years back. YOU may forget it, but I will hold it with me and pop it up to you every now and then, disturbing your friendship. YOU might have homework to do, but I want to watch some TV. and I could manipulate YOU to do what I want……and play memories of “funniness” to lure YOU to my commands. YOU know it yourself…….
So I’ll get to the point. Jumbledness is a part of everyone’s identity. I process and think faster than the speed of light; I led you to make decisions, etc. But I am still dangerous because I wield so much power over you. I may be the one who leads you to detention tomorrow or makes you make bad choices. As a world, and especially in America, people as individuals are encouraged to have their own views and individuality in doing what’s right.
I might be your enemy. I might be your friend. That depends on what stance you take. Who you want to be is up to you. Because life is essentially how YOU guide me. And how YOU make me work for you. For so many today, intelligence is perceived a great trait. Cohesiveness, lucidity, elucidation, theme, purpose, argument, etc, are all core ideals schools espouse in YOU–each of which YOU obtain through me. YOU decide whether to do homework or not. YOU decide when and how to use your time. I am just your helper, not master. Because by nature I am jumbled….I don’t think straight. I make YOU wander through random thoughts and memories and feelings…..but YOU overall have to control what YOU want from me.
Reading this, YOU may be confused. YOU may feel there is no theme in this essay. YOU are used to reading stories by so many authors…….sometimes it’s nice to read what the author inside your own self is thinking. If you’ve looked at this article for some symbolism, or themes, or grammatical rules….then you’ve completely missed the point.
Because in the end, it doesn’t matter what stance you take with me. No, what really matters is what you’ve become and what actions you’ve taken to get to that point. Don’t be the one to lead yourself to making the wrong decisions. Because I, the mind “am a beautiful servant, but dangerous master.” Which of the two I become, is a game laid at YOUR will. Just letting you know.