Room-mate, room-date

It is quite possibly, in fact almost inevitable, that your first year dormitory experience will not be one of luxury; dorms are essentially broom closets saddled up into one big building, where all the germs and farts of all its inhabitants can settle and stir into one big cesspool of flu virus and hormones. I am almost certain that dorms are where Ebola was spawned.

But, aside the less than desirable living conditions and the fact you have to wear shoes in the shower unless you intend to garner your foot with the fine selection of fungi the bathing facilities has to offer, living in a dorm is fun. Being a freshman, it is where you can birth and furnish friendships that will last a lifetime, it is where you will indulge in late night shenanigans with all your floor mates as, you prank your residence assistant, and its where you will be sleeping (something I valuable very much).

And who better to conquer this all with than your match-made-in-heaven roommate? Unfortunately, the match is not always made in an ethereal place—people can suck sometimes, so here are some select people to avoid when selecting your bed buddy for your first year experience.

  1. The Die-Hard Fan: Passion is not a bad thing, until of course it becomes an obsession. You will shortly be regretting rooming with the hardcore Justin Bieber fan or Nutella nut as soon as they play baby for 1,956 times in a row, or they take up all your closet space to house their obnoxious collection of hazelnut-chocolate spread—the later may not sound so bad, until of course you are trying to deter from gaining the infamous freshmen fifteen.
  2. The Saint: This is not at all restricted to any sort of religion; you do not have to be religious at all to be subject to this label. Essentially, it is the snobby, goody-two-shoes—the same one from kindergarten who tattled on you for coloring outside the lines. These roommates suck, probably the most out of them all. College is about freedom and experimentation in all aspects of your life, and if you have a roommate who judges you and emails you mom every time you stay out past your bedtime, you will not have a goodtime.
  3.  The Free Spirit: This is always an ideal roommate choice—in theory; they are easygoing, appreciate a good time, and will welcome you eagerly into the world of spiritual development. But not all things that are “free,” are good, especially when it comes to boundaries and personal hygiene. In quarters that close, you do not want to be rooming with the person who thinks bathing “bad for the soul.”

Now these are not all the people you want to avoid as your first year roommate, but it essentially covers the basics of universal pet peeves and generalizations of overall crappy people. Happy rooming.


(cover photo courtesy


‘Grease’ Up! Chattahoochee musical premieres


Seniors Ian Prost and Paula Ruiz prepare for their respective roles as Danny and Sandy. (courtesy CHS Yearbook)
Seniors Ian Prost and Paula Ruiz prepare for their respective roles as Danny and Sandy. (courtesy CHS Yearbook)

This year’s musical promises to be a blast and will inject a little bit of summer fun in these cold months. Set in sunny California in the fifties, Grease tells the story of Sandy Olsson (played by Paula Ruiz (SR)) and Danny Zuko (played by Ian Prost (SR)) who fall in love over the summer and are heartbroken when they have to leave each other when school starts. A stroke of good luck sees that Sandy’s parents decide to send her to same high school that Danny goes to, but this quickly becomes an issue when she learns that Danny is the leader of a gang of greasers known as the T-Birds and Sandy herself joins the Pink Ladies, a group of girls lead by Rizzo (played by Jade Thames (SR)). The drama that arises is hilarious as they both try to change themselves to be right for each other. “In my opinion, it’s the best musical we’ve done since I’ve been here,” says Jake McCracken (SR), who plays a T-Bird. “There’s just so much energy in it. It’s really fun to do and to watch.”

Speaking of watching, Grease will be Thursday, Mar. 6 through Saturday, Mar 8 at 7 P.M. and Sunday, Mar. 9 at 3 P.M. in the Chattahoochee auditorium. Tickets are $12 for students and $15 for adults and can be bought at the door or from any member of the cast. “Just come see it! You won’t regret it!” exclaims Mrs. Jensen, one of the producers. It will only be playing this weekend, so make sure you don’t miss it!

(cover photo courtesy CHS Drama Department)

“Let’s Make it Awkward” with a roast

A roast, as defined by Urban Dictionary, is “to make fun of, ridicule another; to talk about somebody based on appearance, actions or personality.” We would like to thank UD for giving us the perfect explanation of what we three reporters will be doing here today. While we will not be roasting appearances, we will be talking about thirsty, catty personalities and actions as they correspond with today’s hottest social networking apps and online trends. Yik Yak, Hot or Not, LuLu and #LetsMakeItAwkward will be thoroughly roasted right here, right now, so set that ego aside, put on those big kids pants and, for both girls and guys, take this roast like a man. Click below on the roast of your choice:

Hot or Not      LuLu      Yik Yak      #LetsMakeItAwkward

(cover photo courtesy Rachel Levin)

Average car reviews


“Not many students drive new cars and those who do tend to get into accidents more often.  If a student earns their car, whether it is passed down or bought, they are apt to taking better care of it.” – Niko Maheras

Garrett Kolls (JR) drives a classic, black, 1985 El Camino.  This old era of muscle car is a conversion between a sedan and a pickup truck which Garrett has named “Betty.”

Niko Maheras (JR) stealthily drives in his black, low profile Honda Accord EX 2003.  The stick shift, front wheel drive Honda is great fun but still retains safety and reliability.  “It offers a quiet, comfortable ride,” explains Maheras, “especially with a new clutch and recent oil change.”  The CD player does not work and the trunk light has suffered damage from people slamming it closed, but the leather wrapped steering wheel and basic steel rims cover for all of that.

Aubrey Loria (SR) is the proud owner of a silver, 2001, special edition PT Cruiser.  The car is “beyond beautiful,” Loria exclaims, but it may be possessed.  Some demon or Grecian, Aubrey expounds, may be causing mischief; perhaps the result of a solar-powered, dancing flower occupying the cup holder.  Removal or disturbance of the flower seems to disrupt the wellbeing of the car.  Removed to avoid ridicule from the test administrator at the DMV, the dancing flower affectively caused the Cruiser to break down about a block away.

(cover photo courtesy Aubrey Loria)

Intersections you want to avoid


With an increasing number of teenagers getting behind the wheel in Johns Creek and Alpharetta, traffic is becoming an epidemic.  Many intersections in the suburban area, however, stand out as being more accident prone, than others.

(courtesy Nate Harris)
(courtesy Nate Harris)

The intersection of Medlock Bridge and State Bridge is one where many high school students experience congestion and frequent accidents.  With Johns Creek High School, Regal Cinemas and plenty of restaurants, this intersection is an utter nightmare on a Friday night, and in 2011 held the record for the most accidents with 88 in Johns Creek.  At the time, city officials had no plans on making it safer.  However, the city of Johns Creek has announced that they plan to double the length of the left turn lanes to prevent any traffic from being held up behind.  This will be a major relief since that turn lane fills up quickly during busy nights and rush hour.  Alex Meehan (JR) agrees, “Driving to do stuff on a Friday night, like seeing movies, will be a lot easier.  The trip won’t take too long anymore and not as frustrating.”

(courtesy Nate Harris)

Another intersection that Chattahoochee students and staff dread is, of course, that of Taylor Road and Jones Bridge.  Between 7:50 and 8:20 every morning, the intersection is heavily backed up and clogged.  Drivers going to school head from the north and south on Jones Bridge, and turn onto Taylor Road.  Oftentimes a school bus will block Jones Bridge entirely due to the backup on Taylor Road.  “When Taylor Road gets really backed up, it makes the beginning of my day stressful,” says Kaitlyn Bracknell (JR).  Unfortunately, there is no word if anything will be done to improve the flow of traffic in this intersection.  In the meantime, the best advice is to get to school early and beat the rest of the drivers.


(cover photo courtesy Nate Harris)

‘Because the Internet’ album review

DallasShook and NeelSwamy

Following an impressive debut album, Childish Gambino needed to deliver an innovative and risky album to meet the expectations of hip hop listeners everywhere. That is exactly what he did with his sophomore effort Because the Internet. The album offers a fresh sound, unlike any rap album released in 2013. Gambino and long-time collaborator Ludwig Goransson combined for all of the album production, with some additional help from Christian Rich, Pop Levi, Thundercat and Sam Spiegel. The production never bores, as the beats continually change-up throughout the EP. Gambino and Goransson boldly mix classic strings and gritty drum samples with melodic voice samples and fresh 808 basses that have taken over rap over the past couple years.

A couple standout songs, besides the smash hit single “3005”, include “Crawl”, “Sweatpants”, “Telegraph Ave”, “Zealots of Stockholm” and “Shadows”. The first full song on the album is “Crawl”, which smoothly switches off between hard synths and a spooky piano, giving the intro a dark feel. A perfect chorus by Kai, with a fiery sample from Mystical give the song a flawless feel. The album switches up immediately with “Worldstar”, a traditional rap song, which is reminiscent to Gambino’s earlier classics “Freaks and Geeks” and “Bonfire”.

Childish distances himself from all other MCs with his strong ability to sing. Similar to Kanye West and Drake, who both often mix rap with R&B melodies, however Childish has a much more natural voice, and uses no auto-tune. He showcases these skills on “Shadows” and “Telegraph Ave”, the latter is considerably one of the more memorable songs of the year. A genius self-sample carries the eerie beat and is the clear highpoint of the album.

Naturally, Gambino doesn’t let the album stay at a slow pace and brings all his energy in the intense anthem “Sweatpants”. Flawless production and lyricism met with an unmatched flow fuel the crazy song in what will most likely be Childish’s next hit. The album reaches its climax on tracks seven to nine; however the album loses its steam after the lead single “3005”.

All in all, this album could most likely be a door-opener for more musical rappers, such as Kanye’s 808s and Heartbreaks. The album serves as a stepping stone for Gambino, showing a serious musical side as opposed to his more joking previous efforts. He will have his work cut out for him next album.


(cover photo courtesy YouTube)

College roommate hunting, the ultimate commitment


College roommate hunting – the ultimate commitment. Once you select your roommate for the year, this person will be your everything. When you first move in, roommates usually exchange vows and discuss their relationship dynamic. There’s no exchange of rings, but rather a quid-pro-quo: you can use my fridge if you let me use your microwave.

But in all seriousness, roommate hunting might be harder than actual relationship hunting. See, you can break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend if you do not like them, but you cannot break up with your roommates (and you still have to share your belongings).

High school seniors who are lucky enough to have a close friend go to the same school do not have to embark on this long and tedious adventure. However, for those who aren’t as lucky, the search for a roommate can be long and burdensome.

When students register for housing, they must answer a plethora of questions and write a personal statement so that the university can match you up with others who are also looking too. Although the questions are not as extensive as those asked on E-Harmony,, or Christian Mingle, but the concept is the same. Your responses to these questions set up the foundation for who you might be rooming with for the next school year, so students should put some effort into finding a compatible roommate if they wish to avoid a shrine-making, crazy person.

However, after joining some college Facebook groups, I have seen that the forum is mainly used as a platform to explain yourself in one paragraph in hopes that others who are similar will message you. Most of the paragraphs follow this format, “Hi everyone! My name is _________. I’m from _________ and am super excited to attend ________. I am/am not planning to rush, but my preferences for housing are _________, ___________ and ___________. I like ____________ and ______________, and I prefer that my roommates do too! I’m social/not social, and I am/am not an organized person. _______ is my priority in college. Message me!”

It is as if students are advertising themselves in a desperate attempt to find “the one.” Do not get me wrong, you should socialize with others and make some friends early on, and these forums are a great way to socialize with your soon-to-be classmates, but I find the desperation and extremity of roommate hunting to be quite amusing. Roommate hunting just seems like online dating now.

Remember seniors, either have your friend room with you and be done with it, or at least try to find a roommate by mingling with others (just don’t sound too desperate about it). Putting in some effort is better than putting in none and rooming with some random, potential psychopath, serial killer. Best of luck to all.

(cover photo courtesy various roommate finding services)

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